Vulnerabiltiy, Insecurity, and Other Human Frailties :: The Life of the Traegorn

The Life of the Traegorn

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Vulnerabiltiy, Insecurity, and Other Human Frailties
Posted June 25, 2004 - 0:43:11

So, tonight has me feeling slightly meloncholy for no particular reason. Well, I lie -- I'm pretty sure I know why.

Why do I do that? Sometimes I pretend I don't know why I'm feeling a way when I'm perfectly aware of why. I mean, yeah, there are legitimate times when I don't know why I'm doing something - they happen often. But sometimes when I'm in a particularly bad mood, I deflect and pretend like I'm unaware what the problem is. Well, let me be clear: When I'm sad, I'm usually damned well aware what the problem is.

On what I'm willing to admit publicly, I've had a couple of crappy days at work. Yesterday I was just sucking, although as everyone on my team performed just as badly including the team captain, today wasn't completely my fault. But needless to say, it isn't doing a whole lot for my self esteem.

Bah. I need to pull myself up off the mat. I have the ability to do this job, plain and simple, and there's no reason that I shouldn't be able to turn this around.

I'm still deciding whether or not I'll go to my court date on Monday morning. See, I can't guarantee that I'll be able to get the money in the mail in time to make my payment date... this sucks. Really, it does.

Well, I don't have to decide tonight I guess...

I think I'm going to cut this entry a little shorter than normal. I need to crash and go to sleep.

Yeah, sleep is good...
- Traegorn